Crashing & Burning!
What happens when a smooth mediation gets turned upside-down
“Ruth” and “Abel” had a real problem. They had spent four mediation sessions with me. They had fortunately come to a plan for parenting their daughter quite smoothly, and they had identified the financial decisions that needed to be made.
They had even started cracking a few jokes as they saw the finish line in sight.
But Abel couldn’t get past the fact that Ruth had inherited money and kept it separately throughout their marriage. He thought he was entitled to some of it considering that he made much less money than her anyways. Ruth knew (correctly) that inheritances generally remain separate property, and not marital property, in both community and non-community property states.
So Ruth made it loud and clear that there was no way Abel was getting his hands on her inheritance! We went from motoring through financial decisions together, to suddenly crashing and burning in the matter of minutes.
Both of them were threatening to run to the courthouse and have the judge decide (even though it would take years and many dollars to ever get to that point)!
What do I do when it seems the whole plan is coming crashing down around us after several successful sessions? I give up! Well, no . . . I don’t give up on THEM.
But sometimes, even the most proven mediation techniques have to be put aside to allow some cooldown time. You’d be amazed how some space and time can change perspectives and allow seeing more forest than trees.
I told Ruth and Abel to come back to me in two weeks. In the meantime, Abel did some research and realized that his legal position was weak. They came back to me, made some small changes to their financial plan to address Abel’s money situation, and we finished up.
Don’t let one crash and burn ruin the big picture of ending your marriage in the most efficient way possible. We can help you get through it. Contact us today.